heart – Rivers Renewed

Autumn Still Speaks

Autumn still speaks to the heart willing

forming shapes of poems within,

and wordflow

filled with light.

Heart Songs Ascending

So many phrases from our heart songs ascending,

poems sparkle in the woodland sun

and the colors,

are only just beginning.

Simple Words Gently Spoken

Simple words gently spoken, will begin the wholeness we so desperately need

even those dark passages

we thought would never heal,

will melt away

in the presence

of love.

Some Who Find the Light

Some who find the light still can’t find their way,

preferring the darkness of conspiracies,

their own hearts drifting,

lost at sea.

Yet some who find the light know the way of love,

becoming a beacon, a sign of hope

for each one of us.

Not really following a doctrine,

simply being

who we were intended to be.

Amen.

With a Trans Woman at the Vegan Place II

“Dude! You have anger issues!” It was Ally desperately attempting to de-escalate the situation. Nathan and the manager were now face to face in a silent stare off. Nathan had just been told, “Sir you either calm down or you will have to leave!”

Nathan decided to do the unexpected thing and sit back down in his chair, while saying to the manager, “Why don’t you sit down for a minute and let me tell you our story of coming in here today….” When the manager did pull up a chair, the entire restaurant breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank God!” someone said.

Ally visibly shifted to relax mode. Other customers were busy sending texts and emails to the restaurant website about the “unhealthy” and often “hostile” environment. One email said, “It was a horrible experience!” The owner of the restaurant, a Mrs. Matthews, began reading these messages at the conference she was attending in Chicago.

It didn’t take long for Rick the manager to understand once Nathan started explaining. Rick started looking down at the table embarrassed, and then turned his head to the side, as if he had expected this to happen.

Abruptly Rick got up and said “I’ll take care of it. I’ll get you another waitress and the food…. is on the house today. Please enjoy your stay….” And just like that he walked away. It wasn’t very genuine, but it was sort of what Nathan and Ally wanted to hear.

“I’m sorry I ruined everything”, Nathan finally said. He didn’t wait for Ally to answer, “I’m so sick and tired of people being mistreated…..I know what it’s like in a way……I was bullied for years. My pain…. was forged into a weapon and used against me. Ridicule was their favorite tactic.”

“Oh, that’s deep honey. I’m so sorry!” Ally covered his hand with hers. She looked him straight in the eyes and said, “I get it now…..I do. And I realize I can trust you. It was a wild ride, but you didn’t ruin it.” They both chuckled. It was the first time he had ever told someone, and Ally could sense that.

A new waitress came out with the food, all smiles and was so happy to meet the two of them. “I’m Felicia! And I’m so glad you complained about that nitwit you had the first time….”

Overall, it was a very good lunch, but was it a date?

The next installment tomorrow.

A Trans Woman at the Bus Stop

She sat down on the bench with tears in her eyes. How much pain can a person carry and still survive? She put her cell phone back in her purse…..even her own Mama rejected her…..again. Her mind raced, she was still learning how to dress, how to walk like a woman. Rejection. She was always rejected.

Let people gawk at her with jaws dropping. She didn’t care anymore! She started sobbing, with her face in her hands. Should she trust the straight looking guy at the coffee shop? Probably not. He had the most gentle eyes though, which meant there was beauty inside him. Again pain overwhelmed her.

***

He watched her through the café window. There….the dam broke and she was sobbing now. How can we treat people so horribly? Her makeup was going to be a mess. Should he run out there? He wished he had more courage.

And he thought, “How much pain can a person carry and still survive?” She wiped her eyes as the bus approached and put on a pair of sunglasses. She was one of the most sincere, beautiful people he had ever…..the bus was gone now.

Tomorrow when he saw her, he would ask her, “Do you like vegan food?”

A Softer Heart

A softer heart knows the way, believing in peace

and tangible signs

that we really can,

each one

make a difference in this world.

In the Starkness of the Grey Dawn

In the starkness of the grey dawn, within the shadows of her heart, Emma hovered above the stone walls in the strength and immensity of her own wings. Palermo was such an ancient city, filled with mysteries.

She was searching for the one, the one who said he would love her, a promise made.

Yet something told her…..to wait.

And there…..he was running in the courtyard……chasing a rabbit? He quickly began changing unaware she was watching, and became more and more of jaw, and fangs and fur. A wildness took over his eyes. And then…..she looked away devastated. Sensing the pain.

She had seen it all and decided she would never know the strength of his thighs, the sweetness of his breath. He would never touch her. He had told her he was not violent, and he lied.

He was nothing but horror and blood. Part wolf she could understand, but a liar? A killer? Never.

She quickly summoned more of the grey clouds to hide her escape. Calling forth the wind and the rain, thinking they would cleanse her of what she had seen and her stupidity for trusting him. She drew herself in, with the comfort of her wings. She aimed for Milan.

He never knew she found out his secret, only that there was something strange in the wind that day, and in the rain…..

Blue Skies and Storms

From time to time some of my international readers will simply be aghast at how dysfunctional and seemingly insane our politics are here in the U.S. I’ve thought about this a lot, and I have a few things that may help with understanding us Americans.

First it not simply a matter of two sides fighting, both equally valid. NOT AT ALL. When the extreme right seems so different than the way people used to be, it’s because there is a real cultural difference now. It is real and scary!

I’m not sure how long news shows from the conservative news machine have been creating a different spin, but they do and they create a cultural bubble. Please understand that misinformation and disinformation are not only normal for them, but it’s what their viewers want to hear. This improves the ratings and makes the company money!

This bubble actually creates walls between us. Many conspiracies are floated into the airwaves all to make people afraid, and angry. And the bubble walls become increasing thick and isolating. Did you know that lies are told for political reasons? M.T. Green admitted it to a Parkland mother, years after the infamous shooting of children at the school, and M.T. Green’s bizarre comments about it back then.

Yet that’s another story. Do progressive people have a bubble? Not really, but if they do it’s more like a dome, much larger and more inclusive than a small bubble. There are a lot more women involved and more people of color, black, brown, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, immigrants and many others. And the dome is growing more all the time, instead of reinforcing fears and non-acceptance. The doors are open instead of closed.

Another way of thinking about it, is that the U.S. is like a large beautiful blue sky. Sometimes there are thunderstorms. They make a lot of noise, seem angry and can be dangerous sometimes (like the Capitol riot). Yet the blue sky always returns…. always pushing away….the storms.

Peace.

Note: I’ll be a break for a few days.

Thank you for reading!

The Survivors IV – Guns and Sex

From the Apocalyptic Journal – 83 years from now.

In the foothills before the mountains, the earthen lodge wasn’t even visible. Even the cooking fire could be mistaken for mist from the stream, flowing into the river. In the lodge baby Jay was sleeping.

“Ok, the shotgun is ready!” Why was he yelling? All he had done was cleaned it, now wiping it down with an oily rag. What was it about men and guns? Ridiculous. He didn’t realize it, but Brie was thinking the same thing.

They sat outside, across from each other in the morning sun, today was weapons cleaning and inventory day. He reached for a .38 caliber revolver to clean it, the kind the police used in the old days. He loved the way the chamber spun.

“Grey…” She had taken to shortening his new name and he loved that…. especially when she said it softly, like now. He looked up, putting down the .38. “Can I ask you a personal question?” Uh oh, he thought. This sounded serious. He nodded and she asked, “Why haven’t you made a move on me?”

He looked perplexed, “Made a what??” “Made a move on me….you know….S.E.X.” Did she really need to spell it out? It got worse because she continued with, “When you first saw me, isn’t that what you thought about?”

He looked at her silently, which for her was excruciating. She waited.

“No, not at all”, he said flatly.

“What then?” she asked. He shifted and recrossed his legs. “I was thinking, thank God for a human being that was alive and well!” Tears welled up in his eyes. “And I was thinking, thank God there is someone I can talk to and not go insane. It took me 4 months to get out to this wilderness and I hadn’t seen anyone!”

Ok note to self she thought, this guy has a heart, not like the slime bags she had known. A few tears did make it down his cheeks, but he wiped them away quickly.

That night was the first night they slept next to each other. Nothing happened, but they both felt a need….just to be close.

Category: heart